Focus on the Family - Southern Africa

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Focus on the Family Africa Email Newsletters : December 2006

Dear Friend

It feels so strange to be writing the December Newsletter. It seems like only a short time ago I was wishing you a happy new year, and now the year is drawing to a close.

Our Christmas Catalogue has had a great response and I encourage you to make use of it as you go about your Christmas shopping. To view the catalogue online please click here.

I would also like to alert you to the fact that our bookroom will be open on certain Saturdays during the month of December, namely the 2nd and 9th of December. So if you’re in the area please come and visit us at 333 Fischer Rd, Hillcrest. Click here to view a map.

Our offices will be closed from the 23 December 2006 until the 1st January 2007.

As usual you will find below a Question and Answer excerpt by Dr Dobson.

Please click here to find out what exciting radio programmes will be broadcast during the month of December. To find out which stations in your area broadcast our programmes, please click here.

From all the staff at Focus on the Family we would like to wish you a Merry Christmas. We trust that you and your family will experience God’s richest blessings this festive season.

Sincerely

Danie van den Heever
Executive Chairman

QUESTION: Do childhood traumas inevitably twist and warp a person in the adult years?

DR. DOBSON: No. It is well known that difficult childhoods leave some people wounded and disadvantaged, but for others, they fuel great achievement and success. The difference appears to be a function of individual temperaments and resourcefulness.

In a classic study called "Cradles of Eminence," Victor and Mildred Goertzel investigated the home backgrounds of 400 highly successful people. The researchers sought to identify the early experiences that may have contributed to remarkable achievement. All of the subjects were well known for their accomplishments; they included Einstein, Freud, Churchill, and many others.

The backgrounds of these people proved very interesting. Three fourths of them came from troubled childhoods, enduring poverty, broken homes, or parental abuse. One fourth had physical handicaps. Most of those who became writers and playwrights had watched their own parents embroiled in psychological dramas of one sort or another. The researchers concluded that the need to compensate for disadvantages was a major factor in the drive toward personal achievement. One of the best illustrations of this phenomenon is seen in the life of Eleanor Roosevelt, the former First Lady. Being orphaned at ten, she underwent a childhood of utter anguish. She was very homely and never felt she really belonged to anybody. According to Victor Wilson, Newhouse News Service, "She was a rather humorless introvert, a young woman unbelievably shy, unable to overcome her personal insecurity and with a conviction of her own inadequacy." The world knows, however, that Mrs. Roosevelt rose above her emotional shackles. As Wilson said,"...from some inner wellspring, Mrs. Roosevelt summoned a tough, unyielding courage, tempered by remarkable self control and self discipline..." That "inner wellspring" has another appropriate name: compensation!

Obviously, one's attitude toward a handicap determines its impact on his or her life. It has become popular to blame adverse circumstances for irresponsible behavior; i.e., poverty causes crime, broken homes produce juvenile delinquents, a sick society imposes drug addiction on its youth. There is some truth in this assumption, since people in those difficult circumstances are more likely to behave in destructive ways. But they are not forced to do so. To say that adverse conditions "cause" irresponsible behavior is to remove all responsibility from the shoulders of the individual. The excuse is hollow. We must each decide what we will do with inner doubt or outer hardship.

The application to an individual family should be obvious. If a child has gone through a traumatic experience or is physically disadvantaged, his or her parents need not give up hope. They should identify his or her strengths and natural abilities which can be used to overcome the hurdle. The problem that seems so formidable today may become the inspiration for greatness tomorrow.

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